When I was growing up, if the teacher sent a note or called home to my parents, I knew I was in trouble. Historically in America, I think teachers were afforded more respect simply because they were teachers. Unfortunately, that is not the case any more.
My parents were raised to always respect teachers and support teachers no matter what. It’s different for me being both an educator and a parent. I have a healthy respect for teachers but I also know the kinds of questions to ask and the things to look out for when it comes to my children’s’ education.
In this generation, unfortunately the tables have flipped and teachers are often put in a position of having to defend their classroom rules and procedures, lesson plans, assessments, and classroom discipline to a parent. How did this flip happen? Instead of finding middle ground—respecting teachers as professionals while being a reasonable and involved parent—the pendulum has swung in the opposite direction. Now teachers are often eyed with suspicion.
To make matters worse, because most communication between parents and teachers today is done through email, we lose the face-to-face interaction in which we could read facial expressions, tone of voice, and body language. Digital communication, although convenient and a time-saver in certain situations, has created its own set of problems. Emails can come at any time of day or night interrupting and imposing on teachers while they are at home in the evening or out with friends or family, which disrupts their sense of space and personal space.
On top of that, people hide beyond a false sense of anonymity of digital communication and will often say in text or email what they would never say to your face. You would be hard pressed to find a teacher who has not been on the receiving end of a nasty, accusatory, or abusive email from a parent. We live in an over-protective society when it comes to our kids. If our children come home upset, or the teacher has to share information about disruptive behavior in the classroom or academic progress, the knee-jerk reaction is to go after the teacher. Parents often do not stop long enough to realize they are only getting half of the story.
A teacher at a beginning of the year open house said to parents, “I won’t believe everything your child says about you, and you shouldn’t believe everything your child says about me.” I think it is great advice. In any situation between a teacher and a child, the truth is somewhere in the middle.
